Rider Profile: David & Michelle

Transcript

Kira Corbett – Dirty Freehub 0:06

This is the Connection, a Dirty Freehub podcast connecting gravel cyclists to where they ride through short stories about culture, history, people, places in lands.

David Toste 0:24

That Gravel has kind of been floating around, like, I want to try it. And so then I went on this like rabbit hole of, like Instagram posts, and that’s when I found Lynda. And I was like, Hey, do you know any like, here’s my background, you know, any good routes for a new like me? And she’s like, Oh, wait a minute. Like, let’s, let’s chat. And next thing you know, she loop me in on an email with you, like using me. Kira And the next thing you know, like, we’re setting up like a rye.

Kira Corbett – Dirty Freehub 0:53

Meet David Toste or toast, as we call my Dirty Freehub in Michelle Taylor in this episode. Toast, Michelle and myself of Dirty Free Hub take a ride along the Deschutes, River Trail and Biggs, soaking in the stunning views of the gravel route, while also connecting with the experience of being fully present in our bodies. Both David and Michelle have been diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. The condition that has shaped their journey into gravel cycling. Instead of focusing on limitations, they celebrate what their bodies can do when they can do it. In this episode, they share their personal stories of living with M.S. and reflect on how the snowflake disease manifests differently for each of them, offering a powerful reminder of resilience in adaptation.

David Toste 1:40

Like we’ve talked, I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis in 2021, and for a while, like I was kind of lost and I found folks that were also had. Ms.. But I never felt like people were like me. And then last year, my dad died of dementia, and after it at his service, I remember just feeling like like, I don’t like this sucks and being having this disease, this is not going to work long term. So then I was like, I’m going to start working out. And Michelle knows this and I’ve actually talked about it. As I lean in everything I do, I use this like thing and it’s resonated with some folks. And so when I’ve gotten tattooed, I was talking to my tattoo artist and we were talking about how like when you get painful part people’s like natural reaction or when just like you pull away and you clench up ends up hurting more, right? So he’s like, I don’t know how to explain it. The best way I can say is like, lean in to it, right? And so and it won’t not hurt. It’s still going to hurt, but your body is going to tolerate it when you just lean in to like a painful area. And so that’s kind of what I do. So I got Ms. and I joined the board and I go advocate in DC for them. And so when I found this Instagram, I was like a gravel rider with Ms.. I was like, fascinated by like, Ooh, I want to start biking. And I found this cool organization called Meet Bite, which they started as like barbecuing in Texas and fundraising for Ms.. And you submit an application if you have. Ms.. I was like, All right, I’m in. And I submitted the application in like two or three weeks later. They’re like, Go pick up your bike at River City, bicycles. I’ll put it together for you. And and then the rest is kind of history. So then I’ve been with EMS.

Kira Corbett – Dirty Freehub 3:25

Do you want to describe a little bit more about your experience with it? You mentioned on a ride it’s like a snowflake disease and you can’t really put anything on it. Can you share more about that?

David Toste 3:35

The first time I heard Snowflake Disease, like I associated with like, are you saying I’m so And it’s like, no, it’s because no two snowflakes look alike. And so no to me, patients have the exact same symptoms. So, like, some people could go blind, some people could lose the ability to walk. Some people it’s more cognitive, right? And like I use this analogy and I’ll say it here, it’s like, like we have billions of neurons in our body, right? And they, they have like a myelin sheath around it that helps like send communication from my brain to my leg to say, walk or lift your arm or do this. And what EMS does is it attacks that myelin. And imagine like an extension cord or a network cable has like that plastic coating outside what it’s doing. It’s attacking that plastic coating. So the analogy I always tell folks is like, imagine you’re in like this huge network room with like millions of cables and none of them are labeled because you don’t know where they go or what they’re communicating to. But some of them have like a bit of that plastic coating so that the wiring inside is like short circuiting. That’s kind of what our bodies do, right? And so what ends up happening is like he will affect like our symptoms, the sound and yeah, being tired and fatigued and all of that and, and you know, and we bounce back right? Like when I’m working out, like usually the right side of my face will go super numb and tingly. And then when my body temperature drops back down, it’s like, okay, I’m back to normal, right? Or my balance will be really off. If my body temperature is really high, then an adjustment. But some people may struggle with a lot of their symptoms. I feel like I’m still early on where I’m like, you know, if I can get on a bike, I’m I’m going to get on a freaking bike right now. And all the studies apparently show that, like, the more you work out, the more you exercise, the more you like focus on what you eat and what you play in your body. That’s how I didn’t expect to be this like into biking quickly. My wife would disagree and she’d be like, Oh no, I knew it. It’s really fun. And again, it’s the the meditative. Like there is something about being on that on that trail and hearing the sound of the gravel and the rocks popping around and in the in the Deschutes River. Yeah. And it was super like, peaceful and like, it was like a form of meditation and it was nice.

Kira Corbett – Dirty Freehub 6:00

Okay, kind of on the topic of meditation, it just remind me of like good experiences and tough experiences. Have you experienced anything fruitful from this process or has it been a mostly difficult process?

David Toste 6:13

I think for me it’s made me a way more authentic. And I guarantee you, if I didn’t have M.S., I probably wouldn’t have been on a bike ride with you today. I’d probably be at a brewery drinking a bunch of beers. And like in this now, I went on a bike ride and now I’m at a brewery having having a beer. But yeah, I think that’s how it changed me. It’s like in some ways it’s changed. Like there is a silver lining. Like, Yeah.

Kira Corbett – Dirty Freehub 6:36

And it sounds like you got really into your health and wellness too.

David Toste 6:39

For sure. Absolutely. Like meditation and, and like therapy and all that stuff. Like, I totally see, like the benefits and the values of it. So I’m yeah, I’m all about it for me anyway. think I learned to prioritize my own self a little bit more because I recognize now that if, like I know tomorrow I’ll be shot, tomorrow I’m just going to be like a vegetable for the day. And that’s going to be fine and I’m going to have to be okay with that. Exactly. And so I don’t know if I have ten years ago, if I was told that, telling myself that if I would have been okay with it. So I’ve learned to just be okay with like, okay, maybe something doesn’t get done or I’m a bit more of a control freak of fashion.

So being okay with maybe things not getting done the way I’d like them to, or getting them done when I want them to. But it’s like I have to prioritize myself a little bit and try to maintain that sense of balance. Right, Because I work full time. So having the ability to like, recognize like I want to be active, but there are some days of like, I don’t want to do anything and that’s okay. Don’t beat yourself up over it. Right when that when those days it’s actually in some weird way like it’s actually healthy to be like, you know what? I got to listen to my body and like, I’m going to zone out and veg for a day. Like, so.

Kira Corbett – Dirty Freehub 7:51

Much of our society doesn’t do that. I feel like that’s where I feel like that’s where traveling can give people like a bit of perspective.

Michelle Taylor 7:58

It’s not always supported, right? Like there’s an expectation you’re going to do your salary, you’re going to work as long as you need to to get whatever done. And then like yesterday, I was just like, I work like a 12 hour day and I was like, I’m done. Like, I’m not going to go any further. I’m one person and if it doesn’t get done, it will wait until I get back. Like, that’s it. Like, I’m sorry. But, you know, and I think that sometimes when we’re younger, we’re worried about like what someone’s going to expect or perceive of us. And we don’t want to stand up and say that. And now I’m just kind of like, I’m okay saying it. If you don’t like it, then that’s what it is. And so it’s with my family. I do it like I’m not doing that today. Yeah. And like Sundays when my dedicated I do absolutely nothing day and we were talking about it like I got into football in 2020 and I will legitimately lay in bed and just flip through games for the entire Sunday. And my husband and daughter are like, How do you do that? And I’m like, I’ll, I’ll eat. Like I’ll we’ll make like cheese and bread, like we’ll have a whole thing. And it’s like, I’m just there to watch football. I’m not do anything else. Do not call me, do not text me, do not expect me to respond. I will respond to you on Monday.

David Toste 8:57

And so and there’s a good game on Monday then.

Michelle Taylor 9:00

Yeah, exactly. Well, usually it happened right here on today. But yeah.

David Toste 9:03

What’s the funny thing? They’re like, football’s only once a week. It’s Sunday as well. Sometimes Sunday, sometimes Monday, sometimes Thursday is sometimes Friday, Saturday and like it’s pretty much every day.

Kira Corbett – Dirty Freehub 9:16

With your experiences, you both seem like really wholesome people. And I feel like a lot of times you create that as a person, and to become more of an authentic person, you have to go through something challenging. Is there one thing you would do or continue to share and help educate people about this? Is there anything that you like to share that comes to mind?

Michelle Taylor 9:37

What we talked about on a ride? Yeah. Whether or not, you know, whether it makes sense to know a diagnosis or not. And I think one of the things that I think I would say is that, you know, just because you get a diagnosis doesn’t mean that’s the end of all like you can do. I feel like I still live a normal life, Like I don’t have a lot of accommodations I think I need at any point in time. Right. Is there times where, yeah, it would be nice maybe not to have to do certain activities because it’s a little more taxing. Yeah, but ultimately I feel like I think as a human being we can recognize like, yeah, I’ve got something, I can figure out a way to work through it and I can manage it and I can still have a fulfilling life. And I think that the mental of the diagnosis is really difficult, and how you get past that is what defines you, right? And so I think that’s how I see it.

David Toste 10:23

Yeah, No, I totally and like and you know, we’ve talked about this a lot like on the drive is like social media and stuff. Like people lean in the challenges, right? And believe me, there’s a ton of them, right? But people lean into it because it’s like, that’s what’s going to resonate with folks like folks who are having a struggle, like they’re looking for somebody that can relate. But yeah, there has been some good stuff that came out of this. Like I for years used to work like this office job and like, you know, I felt like I had to, like, wear the collared shirt and the khaki pants and like, I couldn’t really talk to people about what the things I really liked. Right? And I felt like I was two people. And it was exhausting because, like, it’s it’s tiring enough to be like, just me, but like then to be the other person that people I thought expected me to be was like, exhausting. And so when I got my diagnosis, I was like, Screw this, you’re going to get what you get, right? And like, being able to, like, talk to you about, Oh, you went to the Goth Babe show or like, you know what I mean? Like at my old job, like, I wouldn’t even talk about that. And now my new job, they’re like, Oh, I heard this new album, it’s great. And like, I don’t care. Like, because life’s short and you really get that in a perspective that like, you know what? If you like me for me, then great, come on in. Right. And if you don’t, that’s okay too. And we don’t need to like, I don’t need to be somebody else to accommodate you. Right. And, and I think, like, I’ve become way more authentic and even do the things I enjoy more now because I have perspective of like, hey, nothing’s guaranteed. And so I’m going to take advantage of it while I can. Yeah.

Kira Corbett – Dirty Freehub 12:12

Absolutely. Those. So well-said. Thank you both so much. I certainly enjoyed going on a gravel ride and showing you both how the world of gravel cycling for first time gravel ride to Dirty Free Hub is a nonprofit organization filled by your generous contributions. Find us at Dirty Free Hub dot org.